Relevance

Today before I headed into work, I had this urge to read my Bible really quickly. I grabbed it and flipped to a few verses I wanted to read, then just looked through the Bible. One passage that caught my eye was how God was giving us advice on how to live a life in accordance to Him. This meant putting aside all thoughts of food, clothing, shelter and letting God provide. It also mentioned that we should not care what others think of us; we are to live with a thought process that shows our concern for only God's judgment. I thought that was interesting and something I certainly needed to read.

How relevant.

When I walked into work, it took me 10 minutes to realize that my old friends from middle and high school were sitting at a table literally 7 yards from where I stood. These "friends" had always made fun of my weight, my looks and my personality. They were bullies to me, but since we were outcasts of our school, we stuck together. Ever since I got out of high school, I've always wanted to prove them wrong on everything and try to impress them. It wasn't until the last time I saw the same bunch of them (this past spring) that one of my best friends, Anna, asked me why I still wanted to impress them even though they were morons. I knew her question was totally right. Why did I still care? Because it hurt. However, tonight all I could think of was "This is why God led me to that passage!!  Relevance!!!" Though I will admit, I basically failed this test from God, I did try. I surrounded myself with coworkers and had fun talking and laughing with them---though this was to prove I had good friends who actually loved me for me, I failed in the 'stop impressing people, just impress God' part. I will admit that my friends being there also made a block for these old pals to talk to me. So maybe it wasn't a bad thing I failed. When I opened the door when they left, one of the guys who told my old foster sister and friend that I was fat actually gave me a hug. I was like "uuhhhhhh whaattt???" Hahaha. And Kristen, a girl who was best friends with the worst bully of them all, but who was always alright and kinda sweet with me gave a hug also.

Interesting what God will say to you huh?

I wonder what He'll speak to me tomorrow.